So how do you find your voice?
Well, this, my friend, is what I am on a mission to find out.
What does ‘finding your voice’ even mean? What does it mean to you? To me, it’s multi-layered. On one level, it’s simply about the act of speaking, of pushing past feeling shy or tongue-tied. But, on a deeper level, it’s about finding your confidence, your purpose and your unique expression, creatively and in the world. It’s about being authentic to who you are and owning it. Unapologetically.
There seem to be two parts to it: knowing who you are and being willing to express that in the world. There is definitely a self-worth piece in there too. As Madonna would say, “express yourself, don’t repress yourself.” Simple, but sage advice and easier said than done.
OK, so most people have a voice, but who has a ‘voice’? Writers have a voice. Activists use their voice. Singers (obviously) have particularly appealing voices…comedians, politicians, entrepreneurs, teachers, your boss, your next-door neighbour, that influencer on social media…anyone who is getting an idea across or sharing something of themselves in the wider world has a ‘voice’.
So how do we find this ‘voice’? How can we wield it? What steps must we take to be completely and uniquely ourselves? What inner work needs to be done and what wisdom can be gleaned from those who have found and are using their voices? How did they do it? Well, that’s what this little project is about.
I’m going to draw inspiration from fascinating people who have found their voices in myriad ways. Think people who use their voices to stand up for what they believe in and make an impact on the world. Think writers and artists who have found, through trial and error, their distinctive style and creative vision. Think people who have overcome adversity and gone on to share their gift with the world. I’m going to see how exactly they did it and (digging deep) will use my own voice, in conversation with some of these amazing people, to hear their stories and learn from them.
Stories are powerful catalysts for change and my hope is that their wisdom and sharing will inspire you too.
I suspect it’s in the doing; that finding your voice is in the using of it, which is why I’m starting this little project.
In midlife, motherhood and murky times.
The act of ‘finding’ implies that something is lost. So, is this something we’ve lost or something we are yet to uncover? Why do we lose our voices? What causes us to lose our confidence, our sense of self and identity? Most importantly, how do we get it back? Perhaps we once knew who we were, but somehow it’s faded along the way.
As someone currently navigating the maelstrom of middle age, motherhood and perimenopause, I’m fascinated by this question: how do we hold onto our sense of self during life’s turbulent times? As we find ourselves buffeted by the winds of change, how do we stay our course? Or, do we seek out distant shores? How do we find the courage to sail into the unknown?
Well, cheesy maritime metaphors aside, that’s precisely what I’m setting out to do. I feel I have very much lost my voice in various ways, over the past few years, and I’m obsessed with this topic and in these liminal stages of life.
I am on a mission to get my mojo back and re-discover my voice. I suspect it’s in the doing; that finding your voice is in the using of it, which is why I’m embarking on this little project, to share thoughts, struggles, ideas. Basically to use my voice, instead of muting it and lurking in the shadows.
This is a work in progress. I am a work in progress (aren’t we all?) I hope that these discoveries might be useful to you too. I have a hunch that it’s through these times of upheaval that we find out who we really are. It might feel overwhelming and fucking hard, but in the crucible of change, the dross in burnt away and all that remains is… hopefully the real you. An alchemical voila! I’ll keep you posted on that one.
So, I invite you to join me on this voyage (ahem) of curiosity, vulnerability and uncertainty. I am going to try out different techniques and ideas and look at this question from all angles; personal, cultural, societal, biological, mythical - even mystical. I’m going to delve into topics that are murky or a little uncomfortable, things that need to be talked about, things that perhaps feel uneasy in the speaking. All this I offer up to you, who might be in a similar place, on a similar quest. Maybe, just maybe, we’ll find our voices along the way.